I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
