Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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