I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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