After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
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