They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
Randomize
