You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
