What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
My penis needs a shock collar
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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