I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Randomize