Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
no you cant smoke seaweed
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
