my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
