singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just invented taco cereal.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize