Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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