I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize