Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
