lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
