but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I will be naked everywhere
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Randomize
