if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Randomize
