Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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