What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
