I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
