if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
