he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
