She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize