So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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