At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
Randomize
