small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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