Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
