i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize