You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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