I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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