boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
One of my friends took me out last night for a bday celebration and I just now remembered that a man blew fire balls across the bar in honor of my birthday... How drunk do you have to be to forget that?
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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