Nicole vs. Life
If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
i dont even know how to be here
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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