That's intense
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize