i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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