his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Randomize
