i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
You can't just leave with hair like that
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
