I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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