I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize