Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Randomize