Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize
