mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
