He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
