you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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