We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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