well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
