I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
