slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
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