butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
