He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize