I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
